Standing here until you make a move/Hanging by a moment here with you.

It was earlier this morning that I realised with an alarming note that my life has suddenly become directed by other people. Its no longer about what I want to do but about what everyone else in my life is doing and do I want to join in.

One year ago, I traded by singledom to get into a life of couplehood. While on the surface that seems like a great transition, the truth is I have lost a lot more of my identity in this year that I have growing up the last 27 years. I’m not saying this in a mildly resentful manner but more in a "I’m so shocked" manner. Now anyone who knows me, thinks (and quite rightly) that I’m the beholder of my destiny, the captain of my ship, the fore runner of my relay team so on and so forth. That I do things when I want them, how I want them and where I want them. People have the option of coming along or be left out.

Yet today, I’m standing still. Waiting for someone to tell me what my life is going to be like.
Maybe this when I realise that its hard to walk through life and keep everyone happy- and maybe now is a good time to go buy those really expensive special shoes.

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